Abhishek Agarwal


We all believe that having a family that is spouse and kids is so wonderful. You start weaving big dreams for your child right from the day he/she is born. But just giving them food & clothing does not make you a good parent. You can spend money on your child endlessly but it is far more important to invest your time & emotions in them.

The children are like an encyclopedia of questions and you must face all their queries carefully else you might crop in some devilish idea in to their li’l but very mysterious minds.

One of the most important aspects of parenting is to build a self esteem in your child. This way, you child would be able to achieve success in regards of life, irrespective of the field they opt to go for.

Here are some phenomenon & facts as defined by the expert psychologists about building self esteem among children:

1. It is an undeniable fact that until & unless one love themselves to the extent that they realize their strengths & weaknesses & can use these at their best, the individuals can never become successful.

2. In order to live a long & happy life one must have complete trust on them selves and their capabilities.

3. At the end, all these factors turn out to be the ingredients of having contented & full fledged life.

4. The experts have long debated results on the fact that where & how exactly self esteem in the child comes from. While some psychologists are of the view that it is the function of one’s personality that you usually acquire from both the parents. That is, the confident parents generally have confident kids.

5. However, there are psychologists who deny the theory given above and do not believe that genetic play absolutely any role in this regard. They believe that self esteem & confidence are a function of chance. They believe that some people are just born with that high self-esteem and others are born to have low ranges, quite like the intelligence quotients in the individuals.

6. Another very interesting and diversified view on this issue is that self esteem & confidence in a person are defined by their immediate environment & the circumstances. Your personal experience, choice of friends, parental practices, and the discovery of talents are key factors determining the development of one’s self-esteem.

7. The personal experiences of any individual depend on many further facts like:

a. In the form they face the bullying in the school.

b. Their inter-actions in the social group.

The children who have suffered much bullying tend to have a lower self esteem. Similar things apply with the children who remain outside the social group.

8. Another factor that primarily defines the level of development of self esteem in the kids is their parental practice.

a. The kind of examples the parents discuss before the child or the examples they set, influence his thoughts to a great deal.

b. For instance, a child whose parents always make him take his/her decisions all by himself/herself and they trust his decisions would tend to have a very high self esteem inn the long run.

c. As compared to the over protected children and those who are quite coddled by the parents, such kids would have quite better confidence in themselves.

d. The parents who behave very strict with the child or those who make their child feel helpless, their kids are often not able to make their own decisions with confidence.

e. Hence, the parents must watch their behavior with their kids & also what examples they are setting before their children.

9. The social group & friends that the child chooses for himself / herself also plays a major role in developing their personality.

a. In case you become a part of a group that embraces you individuality in all respects & respects their personal opinions as well, this would definitely have a very positive impact on the growth of your confidence & self esteem.

b. Actually the rapid contrast with your social group puts you down as the person.

c. Having a good social group also cushions you against the various threats of the outside forces that you think would destroy and / or lower your self-esteem.

10. Cliques so play a major role as well.

a. In case you are one among the populars of the high school, it strengthens your ego more as compared to the other groups that are ostracized.

11. In case you have some talent or ability that makes you ahead of the crowd, it serves as a strong tool to build your self esteem & confidence.

a. It helps you offer something to the world that they can admire.

b. This admiration would build more trust & confidence of yours on your individuality.

c. The affirmations, accolades & admirations are often treated some great ego boosts for the individuals at all ages.

d. This proves why the people who become personalities owing to their own talents possess a very high self-esteem as compared to the others.

12. Anyways, self esteem must be alive in your personality in all parlances of the life.

a. For instance, you must be a hero for the school circle, but in your other social inter-actions you fail to utter a single word.

b. The fact is that there are just a few individuals who succeed in achieving that apt & right balance of their self-esteem unanimously in all the walks of life.

Jon Mercer


You may realize that your self confidence is not as good as it could be, but do you know how to improve your self esteem and overcome doubts, fears and limitations in your life? When you realize it’s time to start working on your self confidence, don’t waste any time trying to figure out why you ended up with poor self esteem in the first place. Whether you know the reason or not, I urge you to not spend a minute thinking about it. It’s like the chicken and the egg thing; which came first? Who cares; it doesn’t matter!

Self confidence and self esteem is basically the same thing and it’s all about how you feel about yourself. When you learn how to improve self esteem, you improve how you feel about yourself. Interestingly, improving your self esteem will also improve how other people feel about you and how you perform.

Linked to the feeling of self esteem is also the feeling of self worth and the ability to believe in your own abilities. The better you feel about yourself, the more you’ll see what you are capable of. Studies show that a strong self confidence can be linked to financial success and success in relationships. It is only common sense; for one, if you don’t believe in yourself why should other people believe in you. Secondly, if you are in a relationship and you don’t like or love yourself very much, you are making it much harder for the other person to love you.

When you learn how to improve self esteem, you also become more likely to take some chances and try something new because you are no longer certain you will fail. Taking some chances can get you great results in business and it makes you stand out as someone who is innovative and has courage.

Taking some chances in your personal life takes you a little bit outside your comfort zone and introduces you to new and exiting things and people.

Making the choice to improve self esteem is making the choice to improve life. Confident people are not afraid to go after what they want and create the life of their dreams. If you have lived a life in the shadow of your low self esteem you may not even know what it is you want because you never dared to dream of what you could not have.

With increased self confidence you have the chance to go out and find your dream. You can find out what is really is you want in life and go after it. Even more importantly; you can discover who you really are.

To improve self esteem is not to never ever feel insecure again. Everybody feels insecure in certain situations, but the difference is that the confident person never looses the feeling of self worth and love he has for himself, even when he’s feeling some insecurity.

I you are suffering from poor self confidence, the best thing you can do for yourself and the people around you is to start working on it. To learn how to improve self esteem is the first step in claiming your happiness, and it really can make your life a much better one.

blue z


I’ve seen psychology texts refer to “high (or low) self-regard,” and I’m wondering if this is just an alternative way of referring to self-esteem.
@Andrea A: I don’t think that’s right. Maybe self-perception fits what you’re think of, but not self-regard.

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liz jones


Do you think that parents can influence their kid’s grades at school?

Some parents leave the “education side” of things to the school. But, when you see your own child struggling, you want to do something and quick. There’s nothing harder than being a parent and not being able to help your kids when they need it is there?

We all know the pressure our kids are under to perform, society seems to have gone education crazy. We are embarrassed if our kids are not getting the grades at school. There’s so much competition, getting them in the best schools, monitoring the league tables, eventually turns into an obsession. I know people who have uprooted their entire family to move into a “catchment area” of a good school. Well, listen to this true story- my own son was struggling with school work, he hated it. Homework time was a nightmare in our house, bribes, threats, throwing books across the room, all regular occurrences. He wouldn’t read, wouldn’t learn his spellings, parent days were embarrassing! However, after the last parent day I was so shocked at the teacher’s comments I took matters into my own hands. I came across an article in the local paper about how a well known supplement can increase concentration levels in kids. I jumped on the internet and ordered a batch quickly. The article told of a study that took a group of school aged kids and gave them this supplement every day for 60 days. They tested them at the beginning of the study and again at the end. The results, ASTOUNDING!!! But get this, the most improved group of all were the kids who were labeled “slow” or “bit dim”. It seems that this “brain food” works best on kids whose concentration levels are low.

Very basically this is how it works, the brain cells are linked by pathways, essential fatty acids strengthen the pathways making them stronger and healthier thus enabling the cells to work together more efficiently.

More importantly our bodies cannot manufacture these acids, we have to obtain them from our diet. Unfortunately a typical western diet contains very little of these acids and it is estimated that the typical American is 95-99% deficient. It may be of little surprise then compared to other cultures we do not do well in intelligence tests.

This marked the beginning of our journey, this was step one! Every day with breakfast my son had an Omega 3 & 6 supplement. We called it “the clever pill”. I explained why we were taking it and that it would help him pay attention in class and concentrate for longer periods.

I am convinced that this made a huge difference to his concentration levels. His teacher reported only a few weeks later that he can stay focused for longer periods now and seems to listen more in class. The results, well, we thought we had some other kid’s report! he jumped 2 whole grades.

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About the author : Liz Jones is a qualified trainer and manager in the financial services industry. She is married and has 2 children and lives in England. Her website is http://www.lazykidsway.com

Sharon Francis


Developing self esteem seems simple enough to achieve but it is no easy task and requires a dedicated approach if one suffering from low self esteem is to succeed.

Having a positive self esteem goes a long way to helping us achieve our goals through positive thinking and positive action. All of us wish for a happy and successful life. Those suffering from low self esteem don’t think they can reach a goal and may not even try it. Doubts and negativity are the trademark signs of low self esteem and they would therefore never find out if they would have been a success or not. If you seriously wish to live a life filled with contentment and happiness, then you need to possess a healthy dose of self esteem.

Make Positive Thoughts the Norm.

The first step to take with regard to developing positive self esteem is to consciously try to think in a positive manner. Much of the success of the points below stem from positive thinking. If you are one who is in need of developing self esteem, you should take heart from the fact that it is certainly possible and also quite simple to achieve your goals though at the same time it is not very easy to achieve.

Be a Winner

If you tell yourself you are a winner you will come to believe it and will have taken one leap further in developing self esteem. Considering yourself a winner rather than a loser will make you feel great and thus bolster your self esteem.

If you think you are a winner and successful you already halfway to achieving your goal.

Don’t Doubt Success

If you stop doing something before you have really tried because you doubt yourself you may be suffering from low self esteem. Having doubts about your own abilities is a very common symptom of low self esteem. This is the point where you have to have strong positive thoughts and be able to tell yourself that you are totally capable of succeeding and that you could actually do the job better than another individual.

Halt Negativity

“Dwelling on the negative simply contributes to its power” by Shirley MacLaine.

The quote above is a powerful and true one. A key point to developing self esteem is to consciously stop yourself from thinking negatively from dawn until the minute you go to sleep at night. Cast aside all negative thoughts from your mind and think positively, you will be surprised how quickly you can turn your thoughts around.

Turns Anxious Thoughts into Positive Thoughts

Other ways of developing positive self esteem include learning to turn anxiety into positive thinking, learning from your mistakes and to turn mistakes into chances for further self-improvement and making it a point to be in the company of those who bring out the best in you rather than associating with those who make you do the wrong things and do not give you the credit and encouragement you deserve.

Search for Your Real Self

Take some steps to discover your real self. Some other simple steps that you can take with regard to developing self esteem knowing just what you can succeed at and what will make you fail and in addition. You will be able to take responsibility for your own actions.

Encourage Encouragement!

Lastly, developing self esteem also means eliminating all thoughts that can damage your self-esteem and instead you should concentrate only on finding some means to get encouragement and this is best achieved through thinking positively. Again, hanging out with those who will offer you encouragement for your actions will help you every step of the way.