Sudath Priyantha


Experiences during our childhood play a particularly large role in the shaping of our basic self-esteem. When we were growing up, our successes (and failures) and how we were treated by the members of our immediate family, by our teachers, coaches, religious authorities, and by our peers, all contributed to the creation of our basic self-esteem. Experiences rain on us by the thousand, feelings, sensations and knowledge all accrue within us all, but some of those experiences or messages begin to spill their poison which spreads throughout

Improving low self esteem when young can only improve the child’s skills, abilities and behaviors. It is not easy. The first and foremost is to accept yourself as what you are. Nobody is perfect and responsible for everything. Accept yourself for who you are. Learn to accept the things that you cannot change and focus on the positive things about yourself. Accepting yourself right now is the key to improve low self esteem. Even though most people think that if they accept them as they are, that they will be stuck and not change, the reverse happens here.

Positive affirmations are easy pick-me-ups that you can use anytime, anywhere. Best of all, nobody has to know about them because you can repeat them silently to yourself in your mind, if you choose. Positive interaction with children is extremely important in fostering? Healthy self-esteem. Positive self talk is another way to improve self esteem. Take a few moments everyday to tell yourself how great you are.

Start taking steps now to improve low self esteem. Begin thinking the right way, be determined to improve and you will. Start a phrase with, “I deserve” and build on that. Possible examples are, “I deserve a high paying job” or “I deserve to be loved.” Choose an area of your life that you need to work on building and write an affirmation that goes along with it. Start focusing on your positive traits and you will experience success after success!

Healthy self-esteem is your emotional armor against the challenges of the world, and it provides a solid foundation for happiness. Healthy self-esteem increases your confidence. If you have confidence you will respect yourself.



Judy

Muna wa Wanjiru


Self-esteem plays a vital role in the life of an individual. It helps to inculcate various positives points in the life of an individual. Self-esteem is the backbone of all the positive attitudes, which are needed in a human being. It inculcates self-discipline in the individual.

Self-esteem plays a very crucial role in ones life. It also helps in a strong positive approach and helps him/her to face the difficulties without worrying. It helps an individual to build his self-confidence and motivates him towards achieving the goals or the objectives laid in an efficient way. Self-esteem is a kind of motivation for an individual or an action, which makes his more efficient towards the approaches.

Many of the positive outcomes, which attributes to a high self-esteem are not initiated by research. Self-esteem does not prevent children from smoking, drinking, taking drugs or engaging in the early stages. According to researches, positive self-esteem boosts self-esteem rather than the reverse.

According to researches, positive self-esteem helps an individual to attain his/her goals laid in a mush faster and efficient way. Positive self-esteem helps in boosting the morals well as confidence of an individual.

However, according to researches, high self-esteem may not lead to a higher salary, status, or good test scores in school, colleges. Self-esteem provides a good support to the individuals.

However, pleasant feelings and enhanced initiative are two important benefits of high self-esteem found by the body of research. It also helps in motivation of an individual.

According to the various researches, human being can attain lot o pleasure as well as happiness by a high self-esteem, both these elements help in the prosperity of the individual.

The self-esteem movement began in California in the 1980s as many of society’s problems were related to low self-esteem and problems for which the root cause was self-esteem.

California legislature financed a task force for the rapid spread of self-esteem to reduce un-education, unwanted pregnancy, irr-responsibility, fraud, jealously, school failure, crimes, drug addiction and other problems commonly faced by people. In addition, until now they have been very much successful in achieving their objectives. Various programs are being conducted to make people aware of the advantages of Self-esteem.Thus, self-esteem indeed helps in the over all progress of the human being. Even according to various researchers, a high self-esteem can solve many problems of the individuals and leads them towards positive approaches towards life.



Lawrence

Jamie Jefferson


When your self-confidence soars, everything benefits - your body, your relationships, possibly even your pocketbook.

Here are six simple things you can do today to build your self-confidence.

1. Listen to the way you talk to yourself. Experts say that a full 70 to 80% of our thoughts are negative, and that can eat away at your self-confidence - day in and day out. It may sound corny, but changing your inner monologue can help your self-confidence in untold ways.

Here are some ideas:

- Set a timer for random, intermittent periods of time. When the alarm goes off, immediately tune in to find out what you were thinking about. If it’s negative, make a conscious effort to bring your thoughts immediately into something more positive.

- Write your own affirmations. Say them twice daily - or record them into a tape recorder and listen to them in your car or while doing daily chores.

- Ask a friend to listen for negativity in your conversations. When negativity crops up, immediately say something positive.

- Listen to behavior modification audios that target negative self-talk. These can be really effective - and come in both subliminal and non-subliminal varieties.

2. Look your best. Superficial as it may sound, the way you feel about your appearance on a daily basis can really build self-confidence. Go through a stack of magazines and tear out photos of hairstyles and clothing that are appealing to you. How can you incorporate some of those images into your present look? It takes just minutes a day to polish your appearance, and you’ll instantly look and feel more self-confident. When you look and feel more confident, you’ll act more confident. And when you act more confident, you’ll *be* more confident.

3. Stand up straight. When you are feeling down, you are more likely to slouch and frown, which can make a bad mood even worse. Next time you don’t feel like smiling, pull your shoulders back, stand tall, and smile. Before you know it, your smile will be genuine. And you will be exhibiting a more self-confident you to the world.

4. Examine the energy of your friends. What kind of energy do you emit with friends? What kind of energy do your friends emit? Here’s a good litmus test: How do you feel about yourself and the world immediately after you leave the company of your friend? If you feel down and critical, make an effort to be around more positive, self-confident people. Their energy will rub off on you.

5. Catalog your positives. Make a long list of all the accomplishments that you are proud of, and post it where you can see it every day. Now make a list of the personality characteristics that you are proud of. What makes you unique? Celebrate yourself and all the things that make you, you - without trying to change them.

6. Be grateful. Start your day by jotting down 5 things you are looking forward to. And end your day by writing 5 things you enjoyed. By acknowledging the blessings in our lives, we get a sense for the bigger picture and our larger life purpose, which is much, much more than the day-to-day obstacles of our lives.



Jeff

Jane Saeman


For singles, self confidence is the key to avoiding the partner from hell. Singles must primarily count on themselves to find happiness and protect themselves from predators and partners from hell.

Unfortunately, for far too many singles, sex equates with being loved and being loved equates with self worth. Too many singles don’t have the strength of character or self esteem to be comfortable with their own opinion of themselves. Self confidence is needed for singles to avoid the partner from hell. Unfortunately, there are singles who all too often invite the partner from hell into their lives because that person shores up their own weakened sense of self worth.

Singles without self confidence are vulnerable. They are an often trusting, insecure, but good hearted, and so open up their hearts to someone who turns out to be the partner from hell. This happens because, being good themselves, they cannot believe others aren’t as well. Besides, they need love and this partner is offering it. Broken hearts and even broken bones can result from being unaware of the dangers and the warning signs of a partner from hell. The same catastrophes befall those who, because they are singles without self confidence, don’t take the necessary steps, and learn the important tips that they are about to engage the partner from hell.

Here are some tips for singles on building self confidence and avoiding the partner from hell.

The first tip is that success breeds more success, while failure tends to breed more failure. The latter does not have to be the case with folks who have abundant drive and self confidence, however. In fact, most self-made millionaires will readily tell you that they went bankrupt or drove their companies into the ground at least once before they got the successful business thing down pat. But with those who lack self confidence one failure, even small, can tear them back down.

The best thing for singles to do then, is to start small in the self confidence building process. They should determine where their strengths and interests are and pursue some fruitful venture in those arenas. If, for instance, a less than self confident single enjoyed taking pictures with her or his Instamatic camera, she or he might take a local course that teaches how to use a more advanced camera, take some great shots, perhaps even sell them to a local newspaper or periodical, and even set up her or his own dark room. Meeting other singles in the course of this venture would probably ward off the partner from hell, as the single’s ability to excel in this photography class would tend to keep the arrogant and domineering other singles away.

Now as this new-found photography talent comes to the fore for this single that previously had little self confidence she or he will try other new things, keep advancing towards self confidence and spend less and less time with a potential partner from hell.



Judy

Peter Murphy


Are you looking for self esteem help? Before you go around seeking such help, you should be aware of the difference between normal self esteem and low self esteem. Everyone goes through periods in their daily life when they experience feeling the blues which may then be replaced by a high - all in the same day. But people who have normal self esteem are able to cope with these fluctuations without getting really, really down.

On the other hand, a person with poor self esteem is easily brought low by anything that happens during his day - a dirty look from a restaurant waittress, criticism from a superior, not picking a winning lottery number.

If you feel you are a person with poor self esteem, then you could do with some self esteem help. A person with low self esteem generally depends on external factors to boost their self esteem - things like grades in school, performance evaluations at the office, and following the latest hairstyles are all things that type of person needs to feel better about himself. This is because without such positive external reinforcement, the person listens to his feelings of poor self worth instead.

A person with low self esteem can rely on these steps to improve his feelings of self worth:

1. Contradict your inner critic. The inner critic is the internal voice that gives unfairly harsh assessments of the individual. It provides unrealistic generalizations that the person has to live up to. This inner critic is known to be illogical at times, making it seem that the circumstances of the person are worse than they really are.

You contradict your inner critic by offering alternative and more positive ways of examining the situation. This may take practice but do not worry - in time, you will learn to adopt a more positive mind set through a daily routine of contradicting that inner voice.

2. Be more self-nurturing. This means treating yourself more like you are a valuable human being who has intrinsic self worth, than someone who should be treated like garbage. Developing better self esteem starts with this because if you do not treat yourself like a valuable person, even positive input from other people will only have a temporary effect. Once you forget the positive input you received, your feelings of poor self worth will kick in again and your day will be ruined.

3. Try to take better care of yourself physically. Get enough sleep at night (this may vary from person to person.) Consume proper nutrition and watch your diet. Exercise right. Observe proper hygiene. You may be surprised but a person with low self esteem can usually be discerned by how they let themselves go physically. They may appear bedraggled and grubby, with clothes that have not been washed, hair that has not been combed, and teeth that badly need brushing. The physical appearance is usually the first to suffer.

4. When you are able to accomplish something significant, do something nice for yourself. This may mean getting a much-needed massage, or a relaxing pedicure. You could go shopping for neat clothes at your local mall, or you might just want an ice cream cone or slice of cake to savor your success. The point is to prove to yourself that you deserve to enjoy your success too.

5. Learn to be forgiving to yourself. Many people with self esteem issues beat themselves up mentally and psychologically over even the smallest mistake. Such people tell themselves: I am so dumb! That was the stupidest thing I could ever have done! I will never be able to get it right! A person with normal self esteem can discern between an honest mistake and habitual mistakes.

If these tips fail to eliminate your feelings of poor self esteem, you might want to consult a counselor or psychologist instead for higher quality of self esteem help.



Ruth