Matthew Hick


Have you ever noticed that the people who have successful careers also have a healthy (or even overblown) sense of themselves and their abilities? The ability to see the great things you bring to your job and being strong enough to stand up for what you believe are essential to on-the-job success.

Those who exhibit extremely meek and mild personalities naturally fall into the background. While they may in reality be more qualified and capable of doing the job, they aren’t the ones who command the respect and authority necessary for those big promotions. Strong personalities exude strength and power and tend to be the ones chosen to lead in the workforce.

So, if you are struggling to move to the next level at work, you may want to take a good hard look at your level of self esteem and whether or not it may be harming your chances of advancement by not allowing your co-workers and superiors to see the wonderful asset you are to the company.

Watch for these career busters:

Lack of Confidence.

A lack of confidence in yourself can carry over in the way others view your ability to take over a project and make sure it is completed on time, on budget and with the creativity and attention it deserves. Until you can show a sincere belief in yourself, how can you expect others to believe in you?

Lack of Control.

People who don’t have confidence in themselves often lack the control to get others to do what they need to. Those in superior positions at work have to have the power to be able to get people moving in order to get the job done.

An Inability to Take Responsibility.

Those with little self esteem often find it difficult to accept even minimal criticism or suggestions and may exhibit an inability to accept responsibility for things that have gone wrong (often placing blame on others around them), and the willingness or aptitude to tackle problems that may arise.

An Inability To Try New Things.

Being a supervisor of people and projects requires a certain sense of adventure. Those who are stuck doing everything the same old way years after year out of fear of rejection often find sales sluggish and clients unhappy.

Job-Hopping.

One way to ensure that you won’t move up in a company is to leave before you even have a chance at a promotion. People with low self-esteem are restless and often view their current job as a stepping stone to the next one, but never really stay long enough to make a real impression.

A Lack of Intimacy.

While office romances should be discouraged, you do need to be able to connect with the people you work with on a personal note to be able to move forward. Good supervisors get to know the people below them and take the time to understand what personal issues may be affecting their job performance. People with low self-esteem are uncomfortable forming close relationships either on a personal or professional level that can hurt their chances of promotion in the future.

A Lack of Energy.

People on the fast track for success are often bullets of energy who can handle multiple jobs and responsibilities with little effort. Low esteem often saps your energy levels and makes it difficult to handle any problems that may arise on the job.



Jonathan

Jason Johns


This is a question that many people who are considering taking a self confidence course ask themselves. Do the courses actually work or not?

Having had low self confidence myself in the past and read many books and courses on the subject of confidence I can answer that question. Some work, some don’t. It really depends on the course and the author. After improving my self confidence through a variety of sources I decided to write my own successful self confidence course that really works.

The question is, how do you find a self confidence course that works for you. Your first stop is probably a book shop - either online or a bricks and mortar bookshop, whichever you are most comfortable with. There are a lot of books written about confidence and self-esteem, some good and some not so good. With most big bookshops offering a coffee area it is now easier than ever to sit and read through a book first before you decide whether or not to buy it.

It’s well worth taking this time and deciding if the style of the writer suits you. You may want a more practical book or a more esoteric and thoughtful book. Both will work, but probably not for the same person.

The next option is to search online for self confidence courses and resources. There is a lot of information out there of varying qualities. Before you buy any online confidence course you should consider the following:

1) Do they offer you a money back guarantee? This is important to give you some peace of mind in case the product isn’t what you thought it was. Whilst you can read a book in a bookstore first to determine if it suits you, you can rarely read a product you’re buying online before you buy it.

2) Are you offered instant download? Can you download the product instantly after you’ve purchased it? If not, then how long do you have to wait? You may not like to wait for a product to be delivered via the mail.

3) What bonuses, if any, do they offer? Traditionally online retailers offer bonus items whenever you make a purchase to tempt you into parting with your money. Are the bonus items products you want and will help you improve your self-confidence or not?

4) What after sales support are you offered? Do they offer forums or personal access so you can get personal advice?

5) Has the person who wrote the course had low self confidence and used the techniques to become more confident? If they have, then the course is going to be much better than a course researched and written by someone who has never suffered from low self esteem.

Self confidence courses really work, particularly if you find one. Depending on your current level of confidence you may buy a book, buy an online course or attend a physical course. Decide on what works best for you and then go for it. Remember that confidence is something you can learn and improve - if you want to.



Lorrie

John Ward


Overcoming Low Self Esteem - How’s it going with stopping your aggressive self talk? This could take you some time to do, but you may progress well if you simply stay with it.

Today, I’ve got some concepts on how it’s possible for you to learn how to treat yourself more kindly. Yesterday, I asked you how you would treat somebody you cared about. You would possibly not abuse them, definitely, but you may even do something nice for them.

Perhaps you tell them you care about them, or would buy them something they need from time to time.

In general, it’s likely that you would encourage them both verbally and thru your actions, and you would do what you might and to make certain they knew they were loved and cared for. It’s time you probably did this for yourself, too.

Here are 3 straightforward things you can do to start :

1) make efforts to spend time doing things you enjoy. If you have low pride, frequently you do not do things you need to just because you are either too busy attempting to please others and have no time, or as you haven’t paid attention to what you need to do, to what will make you relax and have fun.

From this point on, start making time to do stuff you adore, like chasing creative endeavors, socializing with buddies and family, reading books you’ve always wished to, watching a fave flick, spend time on journaling hopes and dreams, or taking part in hobbies you enjoy. What you do does not truly matter, except that you have to have a good time and you have to do it. This could be tough to do at first, as you might feel guilty about taking time for yourself.

Maybe you even feel a bit greedy or greedy as you wish to do nice things for yourself. Ignore all of that! Do those things any way. As time passes and you keep doing these things, you will start to be more comfortable in passing time just on you.

2) Treat yourself well physically, too. Exercise, eat right, and get sufficient rest. If you have poor self-image, it’s likely that you have neglected your own self-care, so you finish up exhausted and even sick. Don’t do that.

You merit the same care and attention you would give another person, even if you are not certain you merit it just yet.

3) Give yourself a treat. Naturally, you must look after yourself mentally and physically, and you must have fun on a constant basis. The next thing you must do is to treat yourself.

Do this frequently ; these “treats” don’t need to be pricey. They just need to be something that you can really enjoy which will make you feel special. Buy yourself a new book or outfit, have lunch out with a good buddy, or take in a flick you have needed to see. Doing this will raise your mood and make you feel just like you are basking in praise. These things may appear tiny, but little things matter too, often more than enormous ones.

As time goes on and you continue to nurture yourself in these methods, you can start to seriously improve how you feel about yourself. And really, that is the entire point. Tomorrow, let’s go into ideology a little bit more. This time, though, we’ll look at how it’s possible for you to start to believe in yourself again.



Chris

Lee Dobbins


When you project self confidence you get further ahead. You feel better about yourself and people like to be around you. More opportunities open up for you naturally. Not everyone is “born” with self confidence but even if your confidence is low, there are some things you can do to improve on it.

The first thing you must do to gain self confidence is to accept and love yourself. Remember that no one is perfect so don’t beat yourself up over a few flaws. You must accept them and think about all your great qualities. Doing so will free your mind of a heavy baggage of unnecessary worries and you will instantly feel light and cheerful.

Another thing you must do is to participate in activities that you enjoy. When is that last time you enjoyed a walk outdoors or some activity you loved to do when you were young? This might seem like a little thing but these simple things have the power to add on to build great confidence and fulfillment. Take some time each day to do something you enjoy and reflect on your special abilities. Since you enjoy doing that activity, it means that you have all the aptitude and intelligence necessary to do the job effortlessly even though you may not realize it.

Setting and achieving your goals is another step in gaining self confidence but many people set unrealistic goals and when they fail to achieve them it undermines their self confidence. Even if you have a lofty goal, break it down into smaller steps. Then you can check off each completed step as a goal successfully reached and be that much closer to your ultimate “big” goal.

The people you associate with play an important role in your self confidence. If your loved ones are always criticizing you then this will do nothing for your self confidence. You need to stay away from people like this and gravitate towards those with a positive outlook that will support you. This will do wonders for your self confidence!

In addition to listening to what others have to say about you, you need to be aware of your own self talk. Do you think “I could never do that?” or “I didn’t do a good job” a lot? You must change this type of self talk to be more positive. How about ‘I did my best and it came out pretty good” instead? You need to realize that you are a unique individual with your own special place in the world and realize you can succeed at any reasonable task and can handle lifes daily tests. The key is to not become so over confident that you stop listening to others and think that you know everything. Taking in others perceptions, criticisms and praise and filtering it so that you only take in what will help make you better will help in your self confidence in the long run.

Your self picture is what feeds your self confidence and this needs constant monitoring and care. Don’t underestimate yourself and guard against letting feelings of inferiority in. Always shoot for your best and most reasonable goals and keep your strong points in mind.

A good practice is to write down some short term and long term plans. Where would you like to be 5 years from now? Break that down into smaller steps and go about executing your plan. Also write down all your strong points - what you do well and the things you usually receive compliments on. At the same time, write down a few things you would like to work on improving. Have a self image of yourself as confident and proceed to act this way even when you are not feeling confident, this will go a long way in adjusting your attitude. When negative feelings or feelings of inferiority creep in, simply push them away. If they insist on coming back, set them aside to think about at the end of the day and go on with your business using your confident attitude.

Taking responsibility for your thoughts and actions and practicing self confidence will go a long way toward improving your self confidence helping you reach your goals and enriching your life!



James

Paul Hata


It’s great that you have decided to build your self confidence. However, there are a few obstacles that can keep you from achieving your goal. Most of the time, these obstacles are so obvious that they do not seem like obstacles at all, and all you can see is that your resolve to be self-confident is not taking you anywhere.

Therefore, it is important to become aware of these seemingly harmless obstacles that have all the power to stop you in your path. Let’s have a look at what could be the reasons that you are not moving ahead in top gear.

Are you undisciplined?

Some people simply have the talent to waste a lot of time without realizing it. They lack the self-discipline to stop their actions that waste time. Imagine a situation wherein you have a list of tasks to be completed successfully as a part of your confidence building program.

However, the moment you enter your home you involuntarily grab the remote and start channel surfing on the idiot box. It’s only after an hour that you realize that you have been vegetating in front of the T.V in the time you had scheduled to do other tasks.

You realize that you have already disturbed your schedule. In a self-development program, it’s you and only you who has the power to change yourself. Nobody will come to monitor your actions and progress. You have to keep a watch on your inner graph and see to it that it goes up! Avoid temptations and stick to your schedule.

Are you lazy and keep procrastinating?

Procrastination is one of the greatest and most silent killers of confidence. It does not let you complete your jobs and tasks in time; things keep mounting and finally you get overwhelmed by all the many things that have piled up and need your attention.

The very basics of building confidence start with listing little things that are doable. You gain more confidence to take on greater tasks and responsibilities by successfully completing the lighter tasks at hand.

However not being prompt and delaying important things till they become urgent makes you miss the opportunity of working on your confidence and puts you in danger of falling back again into your earlier cycle, thereby wasting all the effort and energy you had put in to becoming aware of your low confidence trap and getting out of it.

Does your old self keep pulling you back?

Assume. Assume. Assume is the technique here. Assume that you are a different person with habits you wanted to inculcate. Imagine the way you would like to be. Imagine a self-confident you taking things in your stride.

Then try to bring into your daily actions the way you have imagined yourself to be. I dream by painting. Then I paint my dream was the technique what the great painter Vincent Van Gogh followed.

Your assumed self will make people react to you in a different way, according to your new self. This will establish your new self to the world and will help you keep up the new self before it becomes a habit a second nature!

If you behave indecisively and helplessly, you will invoke proportionate reactions from people around you, thereby reinforcing your previous self. This throws you back again. Remember that you cannot get ahead if you keep looking back. Realize this and stop sliding back.

Don’t copy self-confidence. Do not try to become like someone else.

One of the greatest mistakes that people make when trying to increase their low self-confidence is falling in love with an image of their icon who may be a sport star or a film star or any celebrity and then they try to be like them.

This is one of the greatest mistakes that people can commit when trying in increase their self-confidence. You have to be yourself at all costs.

Getting inspired is wonderful but merely aping these guys won’t take you anywhere. There is no need for any two people in this universe to be exactly the same. The challenge is to be yourself in a world that is trying to make you like everyone else!



Shawn