December « 2009 « Self Esteem

Archive for December, 2009

Tips for Overcoming Low Self Esteem

Posted by Janine on December 25th, 2009 | Comments Off

Philip Fowler

Having a poor opinion of yourself and of your abilities can hinder many of your goals and dreams. Overcoming low self esteem is one of the first steps you should take if you want to truly be able to live you best possible life.

Of course, for many, that is easier said than done. Some people have such a low opinion of themselves that even making the first step toward overcoming low self esteem can seem overwhelming. The good news is that you CAN do it.

Here are some tips to help you learn to see the good in yourself and to learn to trust in your own abilities.

Make Improvements

Sometimes, part of the things that causes one to have low self esteem are things that can be changed. Being overweight or out of shape is one example. Feeling tired all of the time is another. Some things, you have no control over, while others are fully within your power to change.

If you’re overweight, start eating better and take up an exercise routine. When you eat right and exercise, there will be many positive changes both to how you look and to how you feel. For some, this is a great first step in overcoming low self esteem.

If you’re tired all of the time, turn off the television and computer a couple of hours earlier and make it a point to get at least eight hours of sleep each night. When you get enough sleep you will awake feeling refreshed and will have more energy and be able to accomplish more throughout the day.

Accept Some Flaws

This falls into the “easier said than done” category, but it is a must for overcoming low self esteem. There are always going to be things about yourself that you do not like. Just understand that the same is true for every single person on the planet, no matter how perfect they may seem in your eyes.

One of the tricks for overcoming low self esteem is to learn to focus not on your flaws, but on your strengths.

Try Something New

A common trait among those with low self esteem is the feeling that they cannot accomplish certain things. Unfortunately, this is often a self-fulfilling prophecy. In overcoming low self esteem, you must learn that you are capable of doing a lot more than you think.

One way to do this is by trying something new. Take a class, such as photography or pottery. Do something daring like skydiving or parasailing. The exact activity or skill is less important than just getting out there and trying something you’ve never done before.

With each new skill and new adventure, you’ll be able to add another notch to your level of confidence. You’ll learn that you can accomplish things, and that there is nothing you can’t do when you put your mind to it.

Talk to Your Low Self Esteem

This might sound a little strange, but it is key in overcoming low self esteem. For example, your low self esteem may say “Just be quiet, you don’t have anything worth contributing in this meeting.” You need to “talk” to your low self esteem and say (silently of course!) “Yes, I do! I have a good idea, and I’m going to share it.” And then do it. Even if your idea isn’t received very well, that doesn’t mean it was not worth sharing.

In overcoming low self esteem, you cannot let the negative thoughts have the last word.

Just the fact that you are trying to learn about overcoming low self esteem means that somewhere inside you know that you are worth it. Do one thing every day to put the messages from your low self esteem in their place.

Before you know it, you’ll be more confident and on the road to accomplishing all of your dreams.

Taylor

Filed under Self Esteem | Tags: Low Self Esteem, Overcoming Low Self Esteem

The Magic of Self Confidence

Posted by Janine on December 24th, 2009 | Comments Off

John Dashfield

When times are tough and uncertain one of the most important qualities that will get you through is self-confidence. Have you noticed that people who feel confident about themselves and the future seem to get so much more out of life? Is accessing your own inner confidence more easily and often something you would like to do?

I’ve heard it said before that a lack of self-confidence is the basis of all under-achievement. Often, a lack of self-confidence causes people to doubt themselves, which results in a pessimistic outlook on life. When you access those feelings of confidence and self-assurance it becomes far easier to look to the future with optimism and enjoy life in the present, doesn’t it?

When it comes to your goals, a strong belief that you can, and will accomplish them will make all the difference.

Before we talk more about how to feel more confident let’s get clear on what the rewards are. I don’t know specifically what it is that you desire but the kind of outcomes that many people enjoy could be:

More success in your career or business More money A healthier immune system Feeling enthusiastic Being Happier and more fulfilled Better relationships Greater willingness to try new things

What are some of the ways that greater self-confidence would make a huge difference in your life? What would you do if you knew you couldn’t fail?

Self confidence is for anyone

While there’s no doubt that some people seem to have natural self confidence in abundance it’s something that can be both learned and earned through approaching life in a certain way:

It’s important to get on your own path in life and do what’s right for you. This means living in accordance with your own deepest desires, core values, and what makes you happy rather than living the expectations of other people.

Do what you’re good at. You’re far more likely to fulfil your potential when you do what comes naturally to you and where your interest is drawn. Accept that there are some things that you’ll never be that great at and let go of the need to be good at everything.

Earn confidence it by overcoming challenges and obstacles. This means both internally, in your mind, and externally in the outside world. As you transcend fears, anxieties, and moments of doubt you feel good about yourself.

Love yourself. Not in a way where you think you’re above others but by valuing yourself and your uniqueness. Stop comparing yourself to others and become entirely comfortable with who you are.

Take action. Stop thinking too much and do something. Nothing is more motivational than getting stuck in and doing something rather then waiting for the ‘right time’ or when you ‘feel right’.

Train your own psychology to support you by learning to interrupt and replace any negative patterning. Read books about self development and inspirational people. Listen to audios in the car or when travelling. Go to seminars to learn more. Get a coach. Do what builds your energy rather than drains it.

Avoid taking yourself too seriously. Be able to laugh at yourself and remember that in the big picture few things are that important.

Now imagine going through life with high confidence. Imagine seeing, hearing, feeling and knowing that you are, right now, in absolutely the right place on your journey. Create that deep inner certainty that you can, and you will handle anything that comes your way and leave the past behind…now…how good does that feel?

Written by John Dashfield

Dashfield Coaching and Development

www.dashfield.com

We help business owners make more money with less effort

Wayne

Filed under Self Esteem | Tags: Money, Self Confidence

Self-confidence – your Key to a Successful Life, Part 1

Posted by Janine on December 23rd, 2009 | Comments Off

Sacha Tarkovsky

Self-Confidence is the key to a successful life.

This is a fact, and it is also a fact that shy and non-confident people never find realize their dreams.

Develop your self-confidence by following our daily personal development building exercise, and you will see your life change.

Our exercise is normally sold by therapists and others wishing to capitalize on people’s weaknesses…but we present it to you without cost. Read on.

What is Self-Confidence?

Self-confidence is a conviction you maintain that gives you the will to ACT on your dreams, your desires, and your needs.

Self-confidence is intangible, but when you’ve got it, you know you’ve got it. It is a feeling of personal strength and security.

People with self-confidence will act, not delay, on what needs to be done, and has to be done.

Shyness? Is it Just a Lack of Self-Confidence?

The answer is yes, and no.

Shyness is an indication of self-confidence, but is really born out of FEAR.

Fear of being rejected, fear of being wrong, fear of appearing stupid, fear on non-performance.

Shyness will keep you from acting, and without action, you can never succeed.

Where Does Personal Fear Come From?

Fear is generally understood as a part of our defense mechanism.

Fear was meant to keep us from walking into trouble, and so, it is a positive quality. However, this quality (as all qualities) can be distorted, and instead of keeping us alive (as in fight or flight reaction), it keeps us down and dejected.

Fear keeps us from realizing our potentials. Fear keeps us from making essential steps in our personal development. So, fear is an emotion that other’s use to manipulate us, to control us, and to keep us subservient.

Banish Fear – Break Your Bounds

As you begin to banish your fears, your self-confidence will start to take its place. Nature abhors a vacuum, and as fear leaves you, self-confidence comes to replace it.

Try this simple exercise.

Go to the mirror. Introduce yourself to yourself.

There is one of you in the mirror image and one without it. Introduce yourself and ask the question, “What exactly am I afraid of, that keeps my self-confidence away?”

Pick one subject only.

Pick your worst quality, the one that you know is covered by fear in all respects.

Talk to yourself, while looking in the mirror, and discover WHY you are so afraid. Pinpoint the reasons.

Then, resolve to work on that quality. Resolve to conquer the reasons, whatever they may be.

Let you speech be bold, and believe in your resolve. Each morning do this exercise.

When you finish, sit down and OUTLINE the situation, discover what needs to be done to correct it, and put a plan in motion.

The secret is, just talking about it will uncover the layers of fear, and start you on the road to self-confidence.

Why?

Because JUST BEING SELF-ASSERTIVE (which you have just been) is the first step to banishing fear.

Banishing fear will allow your self-confidence to grow.

The secret is, just FEELING YOUR OWN DETERMINATION is enough to show the light of self-confidence which is your real nature. We are not meant to pass through life in fear.

Jeff

Filed under Self Esteem | Tags: Mirror, Personal Development

Are Low Self Esteem Symptoms Bad For Your Health

Posted by Janine on December 21st, 2009 | Comments Off

Jeff Cuckson

Low self-esteem is both physically and mentally damaging to an individual. It can be an emotional breaking point for many people, if let untreated it can result in suicide and numerous other physical and mental conditions. It’s important to recognize some of the signs and what a person can do to stop them before they get out of control.

Depression is obviously the first and most recognizable symptom of low self-esteem, is very dangerous without treatment, and can lead to the end of the person life. A depressed person will feel useless, hopeless and desperate.

As a result of these three negative emotions, they will pull away from everyone feeling that they are only causing the family and friends anguish. Low-esteem is the result of negative thoughts about one’s self therapy and often temporary use of prescription medications is all that is need to lift the clouds and let the sun shine through again.

Anxiety and panic disorders steam form the negative thoughts and emotions a person with low self-esteem has about themselves. They become so desperate to escape the real world. When this happens, they develop fears and phobias of all kinds and can no longer function as a practicable person does. Fear takes over their lives often resulting in them becoming housebound for years.

Stress is a normal part of life however it can be overwhelming to someone that has a low self-esteem. Because of having low self-esteem they will not usually take the steps necessary to relieve or avoid the stress and this in itself can cause the stress to increase.

Weight gain from a psychological viewpoint is a way to cover up the internal hurts that are causing the low self-esteem. If a person gains weight, they often feel that no one will want to bother with them; this is most commonly seen in victims of rape and other demeaning type crimes that relate to low-esteem. Many people also find comfort in food; food doesn’t argue with them or verbally abuse them. Food is their only friend.

Weight loss is another tell-tell sign of low self-esteem. The person will either starve himself or herself if they feel they are to “fat” to love or that the answer to all their problems is through weight loss unfortunately, they will find that weight loss has nothing to do with the way they see themselves. The mirror in which the physical body appears is not the same mirror that our emotions look though.

Addictions are another very common occurrence in people who suffer from low self-esteem. They turn to illegal drug or prescription meds as an escape from what they have created and perceive to be their reality.

When in fact the drugs are only a temporary break from low self-esteem issues and create a whole new set of problems. The physical effects drugs are devastating on the body and the mind. These substances also cause brain damage or death if the addiction is not handled.

Alcohol abuse is another form of addiction. There are a number of people that will try to drown their problems in booze in order to feel better about themselves. The think of alcohol as their friend because it gives them a false confidence in place of the real confidence they have yet developed.

It makes them think they invincible and this false bravado allows them to do things they would not attempt otherwise. The problem with this addiction is that over time it damages the liver, causes heart disease and even contributes to cancer development.

Low self-esteem is a horrible thing for a person to have to endure and the secondary conditions such as the ones listed above only barely begin to scratch the surface of mental and physical problems it can cause. If you or someone you know is suffering from no or low self-esteem try to convince them to get help, you might just save their life!

Travis

Filed under Self Esteem | Tags: Housebound, Self Therapy

How To Overcome Low Self-esteem With Hypnosis And Positive Self-talk

Posted by Janine on December 18th, 2009 | Comments Off

Abhishek Agarwal

In this hurry burry world of today, there are a large number of people who go unnoticed because they are unnaturally quiet, and therefore escape notice. They are the shy, introverted, people, who possibly suffer from what is known as low self esteem neurosis.

This is a psychological disorder, and is generally not noticed till quite a stage arrives when physical symptoms of the disease such as recurrent headaches, upset stomach, weakness or disturbed state of mind manifests itself.

These people can be brought into the mainstream of life, and while, a lot of their personality disorder, as it is known, can be rectified, it is mostly upto the person concerned to help themselves. Using medication for this does not have any role, but quiet, unobtrusive guidance to a more positive outlook on their personality may help relieve their stress that they are under.

These people generally require TLC – Tender Loving Care, and DLC – Devoted Loving Care. They may come from varied backgrounds, poor to middle to rich backgrounds. Generally causes can be a dominating mother or father or both, or sibling rivalry, where the affected person feels neglected, or is overawed or afraid even of voicing their concern. They tend to hide their emotions, and cloak their fear with a distant, detached attitude towards other persons, because they expect (unknowingly) that person to resemble their own background community. Often in some cases, this can turn into a neurotic disease which would require medication, and counselling, because they would withdraw into a shell, afraid to come out.

Generally this is a loss to society, because such persons typically have an highly intelligent mind, adapt to changing circumstances, but are unable to attain their potential because of this self esteem blocking factor.

One way of getting an insight into their character can be hypnosis, but this has to be done in a very careful, unaware manner to the patient, because the introvert character has a great mental strength to resist any personal enquiry into their minds! Yet, an expert can probe and get the facts right, and then provided the person is willing a treatment can be applied.

Generally, these persons need to develop social skills, which they neglect, except of course the obvious ones, and then fall silent, and tend to keep to themselves. They project themselves as distant to those who do not know their character, and thus the vicious cycle of meeting-avoiding-meeting-avoiding begins, which adds to the already existing factor of low self esteem.

These people need mentors who can build a sympathetic bridge with them, and then slowly bring them out of their shells, and then they can blossom into their real personalities which can be and extremely opposite to what they had been. This is a difficult task, but well worth it on the part of the family, and the surrounding community in which they live, for they are great supporters of those who are not well, ever ready to silently volunteer their services in helping others.

As for hypnosis, and self talk is concerned, the first is a good possibility. The second is not because of the inbuilt barrier, and if that barrier has been overcome, the first would not be necessary! In use hypnosis too, the inward feelings can be drawn out, and the person made aware of how they can change. But this too again is subject to the respondent’s willingness to change. It is certainly worth a try, because these people do want to change, but don’t know how. That’s why mentoring is important.

Self talk and self hypnosis is only helpful to those who recognize their symptoms, and they don’t need the care required by those who unconsciously do not desire change.

Sean

Filed under Self Esteem | Tags: Intelligent Mind, Positive Outlook

Self Esteem