Abhishek Agarwal


It is impossible to quantify the flurry emotions that go on in the life of an individual at each moment. However, to keep things simple for the sake of understanding, let us assume that human beings can be broadly classified into two categories, one who have self-confidence and the second who don’t.

We all must have witnessed at some point of time how the self-confident people conduct themselves. They are normally very confident in their walk, talk and anything that they do. Sometimes, they can be so marvelously eloquent in their speech that we are left with no option but to admire them with awe. They very often evoke a feeling from within us that is if such is the way ideal men/women are supposed to lead their lives, why can’t I aspire to be like them?

The more time that we spend in the company of such confident people, the more clearly we are able to see the vast difference between them and the people with low self-esteem. The people with low self-esteem are normally so low on confidence that they tremble just by the idea of interacting with others.

Eventually, what identifies an individuals’ confidence level is the disposition of the individual. If an individual conducts himself/herself with aplomb, he/she is considered high of self-confidence, else low on it.

Well, developing self-confidence is within every ones reach. Very fortunately, self-confidence is not something that we inherit from our parents, but is cultivated and conditioned during our growing up years and even until the later part of our lives.

In case you are among the lot that is immensely low on self-esteem and want to give yourself a shot in the arm, the primary thing that you must concentrate on is try changing your basic perceptions and attitudes.

Many people resort to spirituality and chant various mantras as soon as they discover their confidence levels dipping. It is the best method to verbally communicate to ones inner self and recondition ones state of mind. It also helps in determining that your actions are not true representation of the individual that you are. The mistakes and errors you may have committed are not the correct reflection of you as an individual. They’re mostly temporary in nature and do not in any way represent your true potential, which is boundless.

All this may sound quite obvious or spontaneous, but still may feel like unachievable as well. What is of utmost importance is that you develop strong belief in your abilities. Unless you do that, you will always find yourself slipping back into lower self-esteem condition time and again.

Such an effort is also vital in keeping you off your negative thoughts and tendencies. Nothing can be more detrimental to your efforts to develop high self-confidence than giving into your negative tendencies. You must constantly be on guard against all such habits and actively try to suppress negative feelings whenever they surface.



Shawn

Debby Smith


 

Negative comments and negative opinions are something every one of us encounters often. People with higher levels of self esteem take these things with a positive attitude wile people with low self esteem cannot withstand negative comments. Low esteem should be identified at the right time and steps should be taken to boost self esteem. Being highly sensitive, adolescent people are more susceptible to low self esteem. Here are a few signs to spot people with low self esteem:



Change in the way of communicating and walking – People with low self esteem will not have the confidence to make direct eye contact. These people will start walking with their heads down. Since they lack self confidence, they will naturally feel down.



Depression and Isolation – Anybody who is feeling bad about himself will be very depressed and prefer to stay aloof. This sign can be seen with everybody who is getting negative comments. People with low self esteem will not be able to perform well in their job and hence they will get more and more negative comments leading them to a state of depression. This will prevent them from mingling with others and hence they separate themselves.



Erratic mood swings – Low self esteem affects mental stabilities and people will become angry very often when they don’t trust themselves. Sometimes, they don’t accept their compliments as well. If someone pinpoints the mistakes in a friendly manner, the person with low self esteem will not be able to accept the mistakes and starts yelling.



Negative self analysis and apologies – These are very common signs of low self esteem. If you find anybody putting low marks for their character and behavior then understand that they have low self esteem. Apologies like ‘I am sorry..’, ‘I can’t’ will not come out from the mouth of a person having high self esteem. If you find yourself seeking apologies quite often, then beware that you are lacking somewhere and you have to take immediate steps.



Fear of taking risks – People who are not confident in themselves will fear to take risks. Without taking risks, success cannot be achieved and with low self esteem, you will not be ready to take risks because of previous failures. If you find yourself that you are not ready to take even minimal risks, then it is time for you to improve your self esteem and identify your inner potentials.



Jay

Kenneth Scott


Many strong, capable women suffer from low self-esteem, which sabotages their efforts to accomplish great things. However, it is possible to take charge of your life!

One of the major problems women face when confronting their feelings of low self-esteem is the opinion of other women. Rather than supporting each others efforts, women can be cruel to one another. Gossiping and backbiting are common among female family members, friends and colleagues. If you find yourself in a situation that drains your feelings of self-worth, take positive steps. Sometimes all you need to do is discuss the matter openly. Talk with the friend who always makes cruel remarks or the coworker who constantly makes negative comments about your work. Women who act like this often suffer from low self-esteem themselves; they use this behavior to compensate for what they believe are their shortcomings. And do not fall into the same trap!

When friends or co-workers discuss other women in a negative manner, do not become part of it. You can influence the behavior of others by being a good example, and setting a good example will also help you feel better about yourself.

Most women have issues surrounding their perceptions of their physical appearance. It seems that someone is always ready to make a negative remark about a womans physical appearance, regardless of how beautiful the woman might be. Even fashion models and actresses who have been given a societal stamp of approval for their appearance have misgivings and doubts about their bodies. Instead of looking at yourself in terms of negativity, change your attitude and concentrate on your positive attributes.

Do not dwell on the kinds of clothes you wish you could wear. Focus on styles and colors that flatter you instead. Self-confidence is one of the most attractive features of any woman, and it allows her to look her best to everyone she meets.

Too often, women believe that buying things will make them feel better. They will purchase expensive and extravagant clothing or accessories, hoping to improve how they feel about themselves. Designer clothing will not make up for the inadequacies you feel inside. After a shopping spree, you are more likely to feel guilty and let down feelings that only reduce your self-esteem even more.

You can become trapped in a vicious cycle: feeling bad about yourself, buying extravagant items, then feeling worse about yourself because of the bills. Rather than going to the mall, go to the library. Find the self-help section. A book may offer the perfect starting point for raising your self-esteem.

Stay positive and your life will take on a positive tone. Keep away from negative influences. Try to be around people who have a positive impact on your life. Your friends know you are a wonderful and unique person. It is time that you knew it too!



Jonathan

Philip Fowler


Some may think that low self esteem just means a person doesn’t think as highly of themselves as they should. That is a dangerously oversimplified definition of that phrase. At its worst, low self esteem can damage every aspect of a person’s life. It can have a negative impact on their job, relationships, ability to parent and even their ability to live a healthy life.



An Unhealthy Life



When someone suffers from very low self esteem, they may walk around with a “why bother” attitude. Because they think so poorly of themselves, they may not even bother trying to stay healthy. Many, but not all, people with low self esteem are overweight.

Being overweight and failing to exercise can lead to a host of health problems including heart disease and diabetes.



Dreams Unfulfilled



While people with low self esteem DO have dreams and goals, those dreams often go unfulfilled, because they constantly second guess their abilities. Keep in mind that even people that are extremely talented can suffer from low self esteem.

This thinking of “I can’t do it” often ends up being a self-fulfilling prophecy and the dreams one had are left unfinished.



A Generational Curse



One of the biggest tragedies of very low self esteem is that it is often passed to the next generation. A parent who thinks he or she is worthless often see their children as an extension of themselves and, therefore, the child must be worthless as well.

Even if they try very hard not to, many of these parents pass a message to their child that they are less than or not as good as others.

Of all of the reasons to try and find help for the problem of low self esteem, this is one of the most compelling. It is possible not to only hinder one’s own life with a burden of low self esteem, but to burden one’s children with that same weight.



Finding Help



For those wishing to find help for low self esteem, there are a couple of choices about where to start. The first is to start on your own. Take a class, and learn to do something new. Step outside your comfort zone by speaking up when you have a good idea. Start taking better care of yourself by eating healthy and starting an exercise plan. All of these ideas can put you on the path to raising your self worth.

Of course, the tips above are not going to be enough to help everyone. Some people may need professional help in order to begin seeing themselves as they really are: worthy of all the good things this world has to offer.

There is no shame in choosing to talk to someone about your low self esteem. A good counselor will help you learn to replace the negative messages (”I can’t do this”) with positive messages (”I can do anything if I give it my all”). Also, they may be able to help you pinpoint exactly where this low self esteem started, and thus help you learn a whole new way of thinking about yourself.

You deserve to fulfill your goals. You deserve a happy relationship. Your kids deserve a parent who understands her own worth and can pass that on to them.

There are many reasons to try and improve low self esteem, but the best reason is the one staring at you in the mirror. The best reason is simply because you ARE worth it.



Michael

Matthew Hick


Our self-esteem is the internal knowledge that we are capable of handling anything that life throws at us. Self-esteem is a feeling of self-worth and an understanding that we are capable human beings that are strong and resilient. People with a high level of self esteem are confident in their abilities; handle stress and problems well and are able to hold their heads up high and feel good about them even when they screw up.

People with low self-esteem are the complete opposite. They often sport a negative outlook on life and themselves; tend to fear new experiences because they lack the feeling that they can accomplish or handle anything outside of their normal routine; use a lot of energy to maintain a false positive image of themselves; and tend to worry excessively and be overly sensitive to criticism,

Our self-esteem is how we feel about our abilities and ourselves. It can have a drastic effect on our motivations, attitudes and behaviors with those around us. It built from an early age), often toddler hood, when a baby tries something new like standing or walking and either succeeds or fails.

It really doesn’t matter as much whether the child continually succeeds as it does how the people around the react to them. A child who manages to do everything right the first time, but who is not praised for their accomplishments or are belittled in some way may grow to have a very low self esteem; while a child who rarely succeeds but is praised for their effort may have a high level of self esteem.

This is an important fact for parents to remember when dealing with children of all ages. Healthy self-esteem is reached when the right balance is attained between the child’s ability and the parent’s interaction.

Our self-esteem can fluctuate as we grow and experience new hurdles in life. Teenagers are more apt to suffer low self-esteem as they struggles to handle changes in their bodies, world and even personality. This is a time when these young adults are struggling to figure out if they are capable enough to handle what life will throw at them in the future.

Adults may experience bouts of low self-esteem when faced with unexpected obstacles or hurdles they don’t know how to handle. New parenthood is a common time for adults to find themselves questioning their abilities as caregivers. The goal here is admit that you are finding a new situation more challenging than you can handle; accept your limitations; and ask for help.

Those with too much self esteem can become arrogant, believing that their way is the only way and that everything they do is perfect, while those who suffer low self esteem may find it difficult to conquer new challenges and find themselves stuck in unhappy jobs and relationships because they lack the courage and strength to move on to something better.

Finding the right balance is essential to becoming a well-rounded person who feels good about themselves, their abilities and exudes the power to succeed in every aspect of their lives.



Geraldine